(To be sung to the tune of Puttin On The Ritz)

If you’re trapped in a bathroom with no doorknob,

Can’t drink water that’s full of grit,

Putin on the Fritz.

Lobbies without floors, bad lights, unfinished rooms,

Can’t make a call, Web won’t transmit,

Putin on the Fritz.

So you came to see all the snow boarders,

Now stuck in your room – cinnabon hoarder (can you reorder?).

It’s not safe with manholes open on the streets,

Buildings not done, tripping on bricks,

Putin on the Fritz.

Have you seen how Putin’s clad, in each room a shirtless Vlad.

Thank goodness for broken lights, I don’t want to see that sight.

Bad food, no hot water, tell the world on my blotter,

Spending every dime for a wonderful time.

Hey Sochi – this has been one big adventure,

You weren’t ready I must admit,

Putin on the Fritz.

Hotel Room Picture

Hotel Room Picture (Photo source: newyorker.com)

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